Monday, April 28, 2008

Where Have All the Fashion Magazines Gone?

The fashion magazine is a dying breed. I'm talking about a true fashion magazine, not magazines that claim to be fashion magazines, but are really WOMEN'S magazines. In my world that means:
1. No health tips or information on the latest DISEASE affecting WOMEN - the ONE THAT WILL SURPRISE YOU! (I prefer my medical information be from medical professionals, thank you very much)
2. No diets or MIRACLE FOODS that WILL get you bikini-body ready IN TIME FOR SUMMER (uh-huh)
3. No interviews unless they are focusing on fashion (clothes, shoes, makeup, hair, home, etc)
4. No politics (that's what Newsweek and CNN are for)
5. No social issues (unless I can fund them by buying a cute shirt or recycling my shampoo bottle - see number 4)
6. No spreads of celebrities at parties (unless we are mocking or coveting what they are wearing, because who wants to see pictures of people having great fun at a party they weren't invited to?) 7. No sex (and, for the love of all that is good and holy, no euphamisms for female genitalia - I saw an issue of Cosmo at the nail salon on Saturday that actually had "va-jay-jay" on the cover. Seriously.)

I have now had to rule out damn near everything in print. Now, there is some great stuff online, but I like the whole turning pages aspect of print material, so there. Lucky passes muster, but they are getting on my nerves as they don't seem to realize that most of us are over the age of 25 and don't give a crap what their nineteen year-old flavors of the month are wearing. I like about half of the average issue of InStyle, but that's about it. It has gotten so bleak that I now treat my catalogs as magazines and get excited when they come in the mail. It seems like the old guard - Marie Claire, Vogue, Allure, Glamour, Elle and the like - have all morphed into one publication titled iM VAGuE.

1 comment:

The Cheap Chick said...

Long time passing... Sorry, just finishing out the lyric for you.

I am about ready to drop-kick Lucky on its booty. Remember when they showed clothes you actually wanted to wear? And could afford? Or, at least, find a reasonable knock-off?

I blame the reign of Andrea Linnet on turning what was once my favorite mag into a Vogue wannabe. She is ALSO responsible for "discovering" Chloe Sevigny - so she is truly evil.